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The Real Reason Your Boundaries Keep Failing (And It’s Not What You Think)

Everyone talks about how hard it is to set boundaries with other people. But here’s what no one tells you: The hardest boundary you’ll ever set isn’t with them. It’s with yourself. After my rock bottom moment, I didn’t quit drinking immediately. For nearly two years, I kept breaking my own boundaries because I hadn’t truly set them with myself first. Every time peer pressure or situational pressure came, I’d cave easily because the boundary wasn’t really mine - it was just something I was trying to do. But when I finally made the internal decision during 75 Hard, everything changed. ‘I can’t drink’ became ‘I don’t drink.’ The boundary moved from external rule to internal identity. Here’s the truth: You can’t hold a boundary with others that you haven’t first established within yourself.

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Pam Rivet, transformational speaker and founder of The Woman Beyond The Cape, holding magazines featuring her story on personal transformation and empowering women to rediscover their identity.